Junta!

After my cultural Friday at the theatre (we went to see "The last virgin", nice idea), and after not joining a manifestation of university people going crazy in the Bahnhofsviertel (shame on us, we are getting old), on Saturday we decided not to get trashed and to play some games. We ended up playing Junta, a game that Gaborno gave me some months ago and has been staying on my shelf getting full of dust. We managed not to get discouraged by the instruction booklet - a looooot of pages written very small - and eventually started playing. This game is hilarious! It is set in Las Republica De Las Bananas, where the president tries to prevent his own murder by splashing money on the interior minister and all sort of generals. Obviously the money is not valid unless it is put in the appropriate Swiss account: this reminds me of the big queues on the highway that goes from Milan to Como, from where, opla', you end up right in Switzerland... Anyway, all these bribes don't stop the minister and the generals from trying to kill the president, as Gaborno, who volunteered as president assuming that some little money would save him, found out when Oighenio and I bombarded him on all fronts. One of the best parts is that if the president dies, his "son-in-law" will take power until another president is found. Then there are all sorts of killers that you can hire, with the best being the crazy killer that, depending on the result of the dice, either kills the president or kills you or kills himself. And there are the student insurrecting, the labour union guys insurrecting and all sorts of insurrecting human kinds. Only bad thing is that while playing sometimes you think that in some places these game is played in real life... Hasta la victoria!

I'm back!!

Miei cari, I'm back home! After 3 weeks in Cincinnati, I managed to take my plane, enjoy my chardonnays and gin tonics (the red wine was disgusting) and arrive safely. This time I had decided not to buy clothes anymore, so I ended up with an overweight luggage full of books... I promise I will stop complaining about the crappy quality of IKEA furniture if my Billies survive this unexpected load. And then since now there is the ban to take liquids onto the plane as hand luggage, I also had to put my brand new Method soaps inside the bag: thankfully they arrived safely without spilling all over the place (together with the Olay Body Quench lotion that Petero asked me to buy, still wondering why he doesn't get it for free...). So now I am waiting for the first washing machine to finish, then I will make my new furry shoes have a trip in Germany - no, shoes are NOT clothes - then go to the hairdresser because my blond is kind of fading and tonight I will host the second event of the cineforum Italia&Cultura (Italy&Culture): yes, today I am not working:-))

movies!

I decided to stop working and go to the cinema.
On Sunday I went to see Jesus Camp, which I recommend. It is a documentary about a Christian Evangelical community; the kids, aged from 8 on, are taken to a summer camp where they can play, sometimes, but especially pray. Background: when I was a 11, I also went to a Catholic summer camp. That was one of the best weeks of my life. It meant 1 week of pure wildness, when I came back I had to sleep for 3 days in a row because I had not slept at all fearing that someone would put tooth paste under my nose or in my underwear (that was sooooo funny, we did it to a girl that always had pedicure and she couldn't walk for 1 day) and I had a huge cold because we had decided to go have a swim in our underwear (remember, it was a Catholic camp) in a river on the mountains. And don't forget the grappa. Yeah, OK, we prayed before lunch and dinner, but the priest was hungrier than we were so it was kind of quick. Now, this is not what happens to these Evangelical kids. They are made believe that only if you repent and publicly admit your sins you can be saved. Only by repenting you can have the holy spirit coming down on you. And when it comes, you see these kids starting crying, having convulsions and spasms on the ground and starting talking all sort of weird languages, as if they were the apostoles. This movie is simply disturbing. It was the second time in my life that I nearly left the room - the first time was when I went to see Titanic on this mega screen, I was in the first row and I felt sea sick. I wonder how can this be legal (the story of the movie, not sitting in the first row in a cinema). I wonder how can parents watch theirs kids being shocked every single day without kicking the pastor in the ass, getting the kids into the car and drive home. And don't believe that the movie is some sort of hyper-opinionated "documentary" like that crappy Michael Moore movie. It only shows what happens. It is so "normal" for these persons to see this kind of scenes that the pastor decided to use the movie as some sort of commercial to attract more people to the Evangelical church. Other scary part is that these kids are taught to become warriors; the pastor clearly states that she admires the Islamic madrasas for the way they teach the kids how to sacrifice themselves for their faith. This is truly scary. There are then some other things, like being against homosexuality, abortion, evolutionism, science in general, that are distressing but expected.
Enough sad things; and enough being this fancy European I-know-it-all-and-US-really-sucks moron. So today I found out that they were giving The Nightmare Before Xmas by Tim Burton (this guy is simply cool)! In 3D!!!And, since the only sort of Halloween that we have in Europe consists of a bunch of 20-somethings forgetting that we have carnival to dress up and getting drunk (Köln anyone?), or having pedophiles making Halloween all year (trick or treat? Zaaack! Ops! It's your balls, sir, in the bag? Tooo bad), I decided to put on my magic 3D glasses and enjoy:-) I have to say, I think I preferred the original version, I think they just built the 3D effects on the original anyway, so you could really feel the 3D only when things were flying around (and then out of the screen). But, anyway, who cares. The kids loved it. I enjoyed it. Everyone is happy.

Metamora, IN

Yesterday Randy, Heather and I went to Metamora (Indiana). This is a little village whose houses have been preserved and restored so that now it can be called an historical village. It is full of "antique" shops, meaning that whatever old they have they sell it. Highlights of the day were the book shop:-) - what a surprise - and a shop that sold all sort of cookie jars. And when I say all sorts, I really mean an incredible collection: 4 rooms full of cookie jars.

firmate per Saviano - sign for Saviano

In the linchi section you can find the link to the letter to be sent to the president of the Italian republic and to the president of the 2 chambers of the Italian parliament regarding what is happening to Roberto Saviano (see my other post). If you feel like please sign the letter: go on "firma la lettera", "Nome" means name, "Cognome" is the surname, "Citta'" means town and you should write there where you live, "E-mail" means you have to write your e-mail address. You then have to click on "Autorizzo ....", which basically allows the people of the site to put your name together with those of the people who have already signed. The mail address is only to confirm that you haven't given bullshit information; your mail address will be sent to Roberto at the end of this initiative. Let me know if you want me to translate the letter. thanks.

Guide to the best/worst Italian magazines - 2

Another great Italian magazine is called Pulp - rivista di libri. Also for this one there is no link - I'm starting to wonder why all the magazines I like have no web page... - Anyway, the main purpose of this magazine is to talk about books, so you can understand why I love it. In the first half they interview some unknown writers, in the middle part where they review books and in the final part they have more interviews. Ok, you would think, why should I care about some nerds talking about books?
1- usually if they say that a book is good, it is actually good; same applies for crappy books.
2- they don't review books that only come from big publishing houses, so perhaps they don't get that much money for their reviews (which could be the reason for point 1).
3- they are very opinionated, which I find amusing in times where everyone seems to think and act alike.
4- I really like the graphics: simple and clean, no bullshitting around trying to make it look designer friendly. Because at the end of the day the important thing about a book is what you write inside, not what it looks like. - Digression: the other day I went to the book shop here in the US (actually, more than a book shop it looks like a supermarket, but anyway..). It was extremely distressing to see how they pay so much attention to book covers, making them in weird shapes, strange fabrics and so on so on. Shame! End of the digression- Actually I also liked a lot the old way they used to make the review pages, the articles were written in geometrical shapes (big triangles, waves,..). It reminded me of my mum's university thesis about some weird English geometrical poets. Well, probably it wasn't really called geometrical poetry, perhaps visual poetry, but you get the idea.
There are however a couple of things that I don't like about this magazine:
1- it is only every 2 months. I need one every week!
2- you can find it only in bookstores in Italy, for some reason they don't ship it to Germany, despite me asking for it. So I have to bother friends to go get itand then send it to me. What the hell.

the magic (mushroom) of politics

Condolì, what the hell are you saying, for sure Saddam was the president of North Corea

It looks as if politicians around the world have started taking massive quantities of magic mushrooms.
First of all, the Iranian president Ahmadinejad started with saying that Israel should be destroyed (OK, no surprise here) and claiming that the Holocaust actually did not happen or at least it was not as bad as they claim it was; and being such a proactive man, he also decided to make a conference to write a real history in Teheran. I will keep you posted on what our Iranian friends find out. In the meantime, please send some anti-Alzheimer pills to the guys, they start sounding like my grandma (poor her) who insisted that I should let her go because her mum was waiting for her. Her mum died in 1956. Amen.
After that, the Russian president Putin said out loud that the Israel's president is a real man. Was he only being nice? Not really. This president, the Israeli one, not Putin, is accused of having raped 10 women. Putin also (allegedly) added that everyone is envious of him in Russia. Ehm...
Then the former prime minister of Spain decided to put a pen inside the cleavage of a tv reporter because he didn't like the question she was asking. Next time what, doggy style?
Yesterday in North Corea 100,000 people threw a party because of the nuke that they blasted. Ahhh, the beauty of democracy...
And per finire in bellezza (to conclude in beauty, which means keep the best for last), what about our great Italian politicians? Well, after Berlusconi is not prime minister anymore I was starting feeling lonely. Also Calderoli (a guy from Lega Nord) has lost his power. Prodi is boring, Rutelli is not talking anymore (or perhaps they decided not to print what he says to save on ink or bytes- and they are right), Pecoraro Scanio doesn't enlighten us anymore with his bisexual private life. But, hey, there is a tv program called "Le Iene" that decided to check whether our politicians, the ones that are in the parliament, are drugged up or not. So they fake an insterview, they collect samples of sweat from the politicians while pretending to put make up on them and they make a drug test on them. Result: a Monte Bianco of cocaine. So the tax payers were anxiously waiting to know who are the ones so that we can flunk them next time there is an election. But, hey, there is the privacy law! You cannot publish the names!! What do you mean you cannot publish the names? No no, you cannot broadcast the names because you have to respect the privacy of the people. But, bloody hell, these morons are there making useless laws while they are as high as skyscrapers for the cocaine that they buy with our money, the tons of money that we pay them to stay there and scratch their balls and I cannot know who they are????? No, privacy law... Ma vaffanculo va.

So, my dears, I go back to what I've always told you: Vota Antò Lo Puerc! Antò, un volto, una garanzia!

joke with friends but leave alone the camorra

A couple of weeks ago I was reading the book from Roberto Saviano "Gomorra" that tells some real life stories about the camorra. The camorra, called the "sistema" by the insiders, is a group of criminal associations that originated in Campania (region around Naples) and are dealing with drugs, fake branded clothes (or real ones only produced under cost near Naples to save on taxes) and all sorts of buildings and related scams. To make it simpler, it is some sort of mafia without the super strong family bounds and without 2 billion movies on it. I was joking about the book with Carletto saying that also the camorra is doing consumer tests: when they cut drugs, they offer free samples to junkies; if the junky smashes on the ground in overdose then they know that the consumer test is failed. Ah ah ah.
Today I read in the newspaper that this Saviano guy is under protection from the police because he has been threatened for what he wrote in the book. Shit. And, moreover, the mayor of Naples, Rosa Russo Iervolino, a clear example of political responsibility, the same idiot that claimed that everything is alright when they were murdering 5 persons a day some time ago, says that, at the end of the day, "this writer is only the symbol of the same situation he has denounced". Wonder why noone ever thretened you, eh, Rosa? Ma vaffanculo va.

fuel price in the US

I was filling the rental car at the gas station the other day here in the US and, as usual, I was swearing at the really low price of the fuel: I could fill this big useless rental car with more than 1/3 less money that I need for my little tiny Jean Jacques, who, poor kid, has a tank as big as a chestnut. At a certain point, though, I noticed that the octane number is very low as well: they sell fuel of 3 grades, 87, 91 and 93 octane vs. the 95, 98 and 99 that we have in Europe. Is it possible, I thought, that the price is so low because the fuel they sell is a piece of crap? I was already savouring the moment when I would have written this post claiming that "uuuuaaaahahahahhh (satanic laugh), they think they are paying less but actually they are pumping all sort of junk in their cars!" when I decided to check on Wikipedia, just in case. This is what I found:
- octane number in Europe is determined by the RON number.
- there is also another way of measuring the octane number and that is the MON, which is a more precise calculation based on how the fuel behaves under load. This number is more conservative, therefore it usually is 8 to 10 points less than the RON number for the same fuel.
- in the US they use the "(R+M)/2" number, which is the average between RON and MON. As a consequence, when I see "87" here, this corresponds to a 91-95 in Europe.
So, basically, I have now a further proof of the fact that we nice eco-friendly Europeans are simply being ripped off. Ma vaffanculo.
That said, yesterday we had a really good dinner at Randy and Heather's house, aka "The German Ambassy", just before verifying that their hot tub can manage to hold 7 people inside without cracking down.
And today I was supposed to go apple picking with Patricia and her friends (braccia rubate all'agricoltura - arms stolen from agriculture), but when we got to the place we found out that the farmers pick their apples on their own and sell them, thus avoiding having a chaos of urban morons devastating their apple trees. Well, actually we couldn't see any apple tree, so we were wondering whether they don't import them from Indiana... Anyway, since we had nothing to pick, we decided to go to the maize maze (which basically is a labyrinth made out of corn plants) and then went back to town to go eat and chat in this really cool tea house, "Essencha". I ate this smoked salmon sandwich with avocado and wasabi mayo, which is definitely going to be the appetizers of my first dinner when I come back to Frankfurt. Hmmm, buonooooooo.....

Safety first

while I was in the bathroom, sorry, in the "restroom" at work, I found these safety advices that Cincinnati State Fire Marshall decided to share regarding how to prevent fires in university campus.
I truly believe this is extremely important, especially we need to remember that:
1. we shouldn't take batteries out of the smoke detectors if the ones of the dildo have finished (game or electronic devices)
2. we should always estinguish all smokes, also the ones of the incenses (?!?!?! what the hell are we, hare krishna??)
3. we should designate someone "not impared" to take care of cleaning after the parties. Basically we need to invite some nerdy girl who doens't drink "because I promised my grandpa on his deathbed" and while we are singing butt-naked on a zebra (Eddieeeee! haaaaalf!) she hoovers and mops the floor with the mocio vileda. I am a genius, me!

Hot Tub!

After a hard day of networking at the WisP symposium, Naka and I go to Randy and Heather's new house. Not only the house itself is impressive, but they also have a hot tub!!!

jet lag...

It's 4:50 in the morning here in Cincinnati and I have already been up for more than half an hour. Welcome to the magic world of jet lag...
Yesterday night we went to a place called Buca di Beppo to say goodbye to Patricia who has changed assignment. I will miss her and our conversations that always started with technical crap and ended up talking about shoes and men. But it's good to know that I will have someone else to hang out with whenever I come to Cincinnati. Go girl, crack them:-)
This Buca di Beppo restaurant is some sort of Italian family restaurant, meaning that you order 1 dish and by the time you have finished it you cannot fit in your trousers anymore. The interesting thing though is that the restaurant itself reminded me of my beloved Eifel Hotel: full of pictures, statues, things hanging from the walls,... The best part was the Vatican room: a big round table with a statue of the pope in the middle, pictures of popes and nuns on the walls and 2 big Venus statues just to make it spicier. Completely kitsh and sooooo amusing. Nice choice.
And tonight hopefully Heather's hot tub and a nice bottle of wine will be waiting for me:-)

Buch Messe 2006

The Buch Messe is back!!
I have been waiting for this for the last month... tons of books... big discounts... something to read until Xmas...
So on Saturday we had some pasta with Carlo and Mariella (and a bottle of wine, the Buch Messe is always crowded and you get thirsty...) and then off we go! First we decide to go to the comics section: the most amazing part was seeing crowds of kids - well, teenagers actually, I'm getting old... - all dressed up as cartoon characters with wigs, wings, fishnet stockings and very short skirts, a guy was also dressed up as a mummy. This was much more professional than what you see at carnival, so I assume there are events like this all over Germany (or Europe perhaps) of which I have never heard of. I will find out and let you know so that we can go and make fool of ourselves as well:-)
After that we went to the international rooms, where our Italian friends (and their books, and their discounts) are. At first we give a look around and then I decide to start my shopping at the Mondadori/Einaudi stand. I mean, they are the biggest ones and they have taken here tons of books. I see the new Ammaniti book and I obviously decide to buy it (so that I can send a picture to OSte and make him die of envy). There are also all the noir collection from Einaudi with a Macchiavelli I haven't got yet, plus the biography of Rocco which I obviously want to buy. I collect my books and then go to the lady to pay. No, no, no books can be sold, she says, because we start selling only on Sunday and today is Saturday. I try to explain to her that on Sunday I am on a bloody plane to the US but no, no, we start selling only on Sunday. Sad and nearly crying I talk to Mariella and ask her whether she could come again on Sunday to buy me some books, I mean, if already Mondadori, who is the biggest one and has tons of books here, doens't want to sell them to me, also the others won't sell anything.
I make a list of books and then we decide to leave. We are walking back when we pass by some other stands. Desperate, I try it again: "excuse me, would it be possible to buy some books?" "Well, we should start selling only starting Sunday...." "Yes, I know, but on Sunday I am on a plane, I really cannot come!" "Ah, you really cannot come?" " No, I am on a plane..." "Well, who cares, just pick the ones you want" This was the first stand. The second one they didn't even care to tell me that we are supposed to start selling on Sunday and I just got the books. So basically I managed to come out of the messe wth 2 bags full of books, my wallett still not empty (since I got more than 50% discount on all of them) and with a message for the Mondadori people: care le mie carognette putride della mondadori, sara' il caso che voi capiate che, essendo una casa editrice e non un ente di beneficienza, se qualcuno vi chiede di comperare dei libri dovreste venderglieli ed essere contenti. Visto che questo arcano concetto non vi penetra nella calotta cranica, e pure comprensibilmente, dato lo spessore dello strato osseo che ricopre il vostro mononeurone, vi posso solo augurare che vi vengano delle emorroidi a grappolo grosse come delle big babol. E, tra l'altro, tu signora alla cassa: prima di tutto cosa stai alla cassa se non vendete una beata fava; a lavorare in miniera! In secondo luogo, alla tua eta' la zazzera sbarazzina asimettrica non sta bene, cambia parrucchiere per carita'. [there is nothing better than insulting in your mother tongue]
In the night we went to Ute to play Risiko. As usual, I was nearly winning when the dice decided not to work anymore. I lost around 6 tanks vs 1 that was defending Afganistan, I kind of felt like the Russians in the 80s. At the end, we just decided to call it a day without finishing: moral winner of the day is anyway Carlo, who was about to win, then probably he is not a moral winner but a semi winner...well, whatever. Remarkable thing is that Ute confirmed again that she is a great cook. Ute, always a pleasure:-)
We then left, I got home, left my little Jean Jacques [my car, for those who don't know it] to Carlo because tomorrow I have to go to the US. Addio, grattacieli sorgenti dal fiume, ed elevati al cielo... Yeah, OK, shouldn't have had so much wine...

Guide to the best/worst Italian magazines - 1

One of the best Italian magazines is Cronaca Vera (no link existing, only from the best newsagents). The magazine is published on recicled paper, which, apart from making us feel environmental friendly, also contributes to its extremely cheap appearance. And this cheap appearance is on purpose, since the cover usually carries news such as "Panic in the night! The nurses in the night shift get arrassed in the changing room by the maniac of the 'mano morta'" or "Young and beautiful girl working in a beauty salon strangled with an iron wire by her African boyfriend who could not accept the end of their relationship" (see picture, the lady on the cover could either be the nurse or the girl of the beauty salon, assuming anyone cares about who she is). Please note the title taking half of the page in capital letters to stress the importance of the news.
This magazine is the cheapest source of amusement you can buy in Italy (apart from our politicians when they talk on tv).

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