5 things that makes you say "shit! I'm getting old"

miei cari, this last weekend I was in France to buy champagne and chat with OSte. I bought a pretty good amount of champagne - the process how they make it is pretty interesting: you take 3 wine sorts (Chardonnay, Pinot Noir and another Pinot that I cannot remember nor pronounce) and they mix it after a first fermentation. Then they put some sugar and yeast, then put it in bottles and leave it there for a long fermentation. At the end of this the yeast is dead and they put the bottles on wooden planks and slowly incline them until they get vertical: in this way the sediments get into the bottle neck. After that they put the neck inside a very cold solution so that the wine inside the neck freezes, and the sediments with it. Then they open the cork, the pressure of the wine kicks out the piece of ice with the crap, they put some more sugar (depending on what they want at the end) and close it with the classical champagne cork. The caves where they keep the wine are pretty impressive, we went to visit the Pommery caves and they really look nice. Also, it is amazing how they have invented a money-making machine: you arrive there and everyone tells you how good champagne is, how complicated it is to make it, how expensive it is (so, my dear, you shouldn't be surprised if I ask you a bloody lot of money for a bottle). OSte and I were actually wondering whether the whole region actually produces anything but champagne; we couldn't find an answer. Well, good for them.
We were also talking about a song that apparently tells you that you are getting old if you have 3 symptoms: 1) you start getting a belly (that could also mean too much beer, but let's assume the singer is right) 2) you start having kids 3) you have to pay a mortgage for your house. I think there are 2 other signs: 1) you find your first gray hair (what a great way to start your week) 2) you have a freaking back ache because you didn't pay too much attention to how you were lifting the champagne cartons, therefore cracking a muscle in your back - it's always interesting to find out that we have muscles hidden in every freaking corner of our body. So basically now I am in serious need for a hairdresser and I have greased my back with a thick layer of Voltaren, which most likely was expired since I don't even know when I bought it (or perhaps my mum gave it to me when I moved to Germany 4 years ago). So , my dears, I score 4 out of 5, and it's not that I am too proud of it. Porca puttana.
Anyway, in 2 weeks I will go to France again, apparently Vinicio Capossela is playing in Paris (why? I have no clue), so OSte hopefully got me a ticket, since I have booked the train already. If not, I will just squat his house while he is seeing Vinicio.
All for now. ciaociao