fuck fuck fuck fuck

as you might have guessed, today I am FUCKING UPSET. So what happened? This morning, at around 6:30, I hear some really loud noise coming from the street in front of my building. At the beginning I thought that perhaps they were taking away the trash, then I thought that they don't take away trash on Sundays so I got out of bed and looked out of the window. And there I see a policewoman - from now on, for simplicity reasons, called "the bitch"- and a guy - we can call him "the motherfucker", always for simplicity reasons- that was putting my poor little Jean Jacques (my car) on the truck to tow it away. So I open the window and shout at them, but obviously the motherfucker and the bitch were too intent in their sadomasochistic pleasure that they didn't hear me. So I rush downstairs and I manage to stop them before they start the truck and take Jean Jacques God knows where. They tell me that they tow the car away because of the marathon, which, dear readers, passes at least 50 METERS from where Jean Jacques was parked, but Germany is Germany and when they do something they do it properly, ja. And I tell them that OK, fine, we all know that Germans need to run because otherwise they don't digest the 4 wurst mit senf they had for breakfast, and we are very supportive of sports, but now can you take my poor Jean Jacques down from the truck? Ja, klar, says the motherfucker, and then presents me with a bill of 249.99 euros. I repeat, TWO HUNDRED, FORTY NINE EUROS AND 99 CENTS. Since my poor baby was already on the truck, I didn't really have that much of a negioting power, so I had to go to the bank, get the 250 euros and give it to the motherfucker. And then, since Germany is Germany and when they do something they do it properly, the motherfucker had to go and ask around, i.e. to the bitch (because at 6:30 in the morning there is noone around, because normal people are at home sleeping without thinking that a bunch of retarded fuckers will try to steal their car), whether she had 1 cent to give me back, because, you know, after they STEAL 249.99 euros for nothing, 1 cent makes a difference (I can fly to India and get me a roti, perhaps). Then the motherfucker takes Jean Jacques down the truck, nearly crashing it on the ground and says samething in German, to which I don't even look at him, or the at the bitch, for that matter, get into my poor little baby, open the window and shout at them figli di puttaaaaannaaaaaaaaa, which means sons of a bitch (and daughters as well, because we don't want to be sexist) - I have no clue whether they understood it but at least there was the satisfaction of shouting at them in my own language.
And the best thing is, I am POSITIVE that when I parked yesterday at 2PM there was NO sign. But go explain it to the motherfucker and the bitch when you see your Jean Jacques on their fucking truck.
So, my dear readers, now I get ready because I have a flight to Spain in 4 hours. And, obvisouly, since my car is now in front of Jack's house and the Germans are running on my street, I won't even be able to get a taxi (assuming I could afford it after this morning) so I will have to carry the luggage and everything for 500m to the nearest public transportation station, among tons of sweaty people.
And, let me tell you, dear marathon runner: unless you are African, THERE IS NO FUCKING CHANCE THAT YOU WIN IT, so just stay home and let me live my life!

By the way, if you look at my post of October 2007, you see that there is a recurring theme of me vs the marathon. But at least that time they didn't steal money from me. Fuckkkkeeeerrrrrsssssss.